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9 Ways to Maximize Your Chances of Meeting a Masculine Man

Why you don’t need a man but desperately want him and why your desire for a solid and stable relationship is true and valid

“Why the hell do I need a man if I can do everything on my own?” modern-day independent women are asking themselves today.

The difference is that I know how to manage my emotional ups and downs and not to blame him, or men in general, for the abandonment, deceit, and loneliness I feel inside.

I see tremendous value in men and I respect their drive and ambition. Their incredible ability to plunge ahead like bulldozers smashing down everything, building anew without stopping to think or feel much. I appreciate their instinctual desire to protect and provide and be the heroes of our lives. Their quest for freedom and living on the edge.

I’m attracted to this healthy version of the masculine. It seduces and lures me in like nothing else. It tickles my sex and elevates my feminine heart to a different dimension. That dimension is where I can surrender, flourish, let go and create. Create a home, a career, a business or a baby without unnecessary stress. Without the burden and heavy responsibility only on my shoulders to constantly go and push and build.

The Most Important Decision of Your Life

We live in a time when women are wronged for wanting for a masculine man who will protect and provide.

The choice of a spouse is not one of the most important decisions of your life — It is THE MOST IMPORTANT DECISION of your life.

I was deeply struck by this phrase, especially because it’s so controversial and because it goes against everything we’ve been told today in the post-modern feminist era. And this decision, by the way, is equally relevant to men.


Let’s talk about needing men. Do we really need men or do we actually just want them in our lives?

I can indeed do anything a man can, and I can do it while bleeding, but I don’t actually want to.

Why would I inflict such hardship and struggle upon myself as a feminine essence woman? I wasn’t born to be a workhorse and to do life, relationships, and motherhood alone. It wasn’t meant to be this way. I want to do it all with an equal partner where we leverage and flow with our strengths and weaknesses.

Healthy masculine men do not hang around women who are too proud and too independent to admit that they want to be taken care of. These men do not want another set of balls in the house to compete against every single day. These men want a woman. A wife. A lover. A girl. Their natural masculine instinct to provide and protect craves a woman who will surrender and let go. Who will let him lead. Who doesn’t need to boss or parent him around.

If you are asking yourself why would you need a man — that question comes from a place of insecurity, bitterness and upset. Because deep down inside you’re craving him and you’re too chicken to admit it. To some women it almost feels degrading to admit it because it would be perceived as weak.

He Exists

Good news — he does exist and he is there — you just can’t see him yet.

9 Ways to Maximize Your Chances of Meeting Him

And so if you’re determined to change your beliefs and get off the “I don’t need a man bandwagon,” declare your desires and attract the mature masculine man, here are some things you can do today:

  1. Ditch your old friends, patterns and jobs that still support the old beliefs. (Yeah, I’m talking about unmarried girlfriends who complain that there are no good men around or married girlfriends who are constantly belittling their men.)
  2. Have a conversation with your parents (individually) about how their relationship was/is. Ask them about what they have learned about relationships from their parents and try to identify what patterns and beliefs have you taken on as a little girl that are ruling your life now.
  3. Heal your relationship with the feminine. A lot of us think it’s all about healing our relationships with men but it actually starts with healing our relationships with women and ourselves so we start to appreciate the power of the feminine and connecting with other women.
  4. Surround yourself with women who have great men as their partners and friends. Even if you think you don’t have any — look closer. Maybe you’ll first need to work on your relationship with these women because you probably think these women as “submissive” or “too feminine.” If you want to change your mindset and your life, get curious about theirs. How are they doing it? How are their relationships? Remember, you are the sum of the five people you mostly spend your time with. So if your immediate girlfriend circle is all bitching about men — you’ll be attracting the types of men who should be bitched about.
  5. Think about the good men in your life. How can you get closer to them AND their girlfriends and wives? Spend more time with these men and less time with the asshole who wouldn’t return your calls. Move on quickly. Chances are that these good men are hanging out with other good men. (But beware of the nice guys. Oftentimes, we confuse “good men” for the “nice guys” because well, they’re just nice. Look out for good masculine men who want to protect and provide and lead.)
  6. Listen to interviews with great men. Here are a few suggestions:
- Girlskill Podcast where I interview women about female success and femininity (a special series with GREAT men coming November 2019.)
- Art of Manliness Podcast
Men, This Way Podcast by Bryan Reeves
- ManTalks Podcast
The Guru Viking Podcast
Evolving Man Podcast
The Evryman Podcast
P.S. I've interviewed most of the hosts of these podcasts :)

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I’ve created a free video training on “The Lie of Female Success” and what you can do today to get unstuck, release pressure & stop trying to do it all. In this training, I share the 3 key proven shifts that my clients and I have implemented in our lives so we can thrive as feminine essence women in our lives and our relationships.

Femininity & Relationship Coach| CLAIMED Podcast Founder & Host