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How I Found My “Thing” and Started Girlskill Podcast

Or the story of how being good at what you do and being paid well is the biggest trap of all.

No more hiding, no more pretending. This is what I’m meant to do. This is what needs to be said.

Three reasons for choosing podcasting as our main channel:

  1. I had done a podcast before and made all the possible mistakes.
  2. I considered myself a good interviewer and enjoyed the process podcasting. I couldn’t wait to get up and press the record button.
  3. Podcasting is growing rapidly and is a major channel of audience development and message testing.

And so it was done. I recorded my first interview on July 6 with Leanne Beesley.

I was feeling ecstatic. We had such a great talk. I knew back then and there that I was onto something. I was on top of the world.

My excitement and all dreams were crushed when I realized the next day that the recording was gone… Vanished into the abyss of the internet. Not on my laptop, not on my hard drive and not in a cloud.

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What do I do next?

— I miss being excited. About life… about writing… about speaking… about my own thing… I just miss it so much. The self-expression. The contribution. The feeling that I am part of something big.

I remember the feeling because I did feel it when I was producing ManInside Show — my podcast about men and relationships.

Every recorded, edited and published episode… every social media post, every testimonial, feedback and review… All of it was pretty exciting. All the talks I did on stage, all the videos I edited and produced, all the designs and branding…

So much fun. So much life. So many sleepless nights when you can’t wait until tomorrow’s interview with John Gray… but also want to sleep faster so tomorrow arrives sooner.

When the reality is more exciting than what you dream of it feels like you’re actually living.

Once you feel it, you can’t unfeel it.

The Trap

For almost a full year I haven’t felt “it.”

Life was great, though. I was having a remote job travelling the world earning more money than I could ever imagine. I was dating my now husband in Colombia and having the time of my life.

But deep down inside I knew. It is that strange itchy feeling inside…That I can’t afford to live an ordinary life. Like I wasn’t put on this planet to simply go with the flow. By all means, it was already extraordinary what I’ve done: being location independent, traveling the world working from anywhere, making great money and falling in love with the man of my dreams.

I mean, isn’t that the dream that so many want to get? I guess so. But the truth is that when you get to where you always wanted to get, other things start to matter. My hierarchy of needs has reached its peak. At least for where I am in my life right now.

I guess it wasn’t a matter of “how” but a matter of “when.” I didn’t know what “it” would be. But I could feel it’s arrival.

I started doing some “soul searching” and looking for that “purpose” thing about six months before I quit my online marketing remote job.

I was listening to podcasts, reading books, watching videos. I’ve signed up for a session with a “career strategist” who helped me identify my next steps: I could either move into working more on content marketing, go into creative production or help people transform their public speaking careers (odd one, I know.)

I realized I was living life by default. Pretty much like most people. I was no different. On the surface it was all great. On the inside I was suffering.

The irony is, of course, in the fact that what I was looking for what was already inside of me.

I just didn’t listen and didn’t observe it very well. I finished college and went for an exciting opportunity overseas and pursued what I “thought” was hot.

Marketing.

I was learning and devouring marketing books and courses and implementing tactics and strategies for defining your perfect one customer avatar, tweaking headlines and call to actions for improving conversion rates (2 percent boost would be great!), coming up with the best landing page headlines and sub-headlines. I was trying really hard to build that bridge between the product and the prospect. I understood the pain, the suffering of the prospective clients and was working really hard to present the solution in the best possible way that also converts really well.

I was looking deeply into color theories and heat maps, click through rates and open rates, KPIs and weekly reports. Automated funnels and evergreen webinars were my jam. Launching million dollar courses was my thing. I was going for it fully and wasn’t looking back.

If I was “successful” a.k.a. “if I am being promoted and earning more and more money every year,” then I must be in the right place. Right?

Wrong.

I mean, it can be right. But it was wrong for me.

That is where the biggest trap is. That is what self-deceit is. People are capable of much more than they realize. We think something is impossible until we actually do it. Most of us have the limiting beliefs ingrained and programmed in us to keep us in the comfort zone.

Why get out of my shell if what I’m doing is working already?

True but can be misleading.

The only way I knew it was misleading was the fact that I wasn’t waking up being excited about conversion rates. I didn’t read lots and lots about headline psychology, empathy maps and latest online marketing trends. Ocasionally I would get really excited right before a launch or a webinar or when the money started coming in. I think what I was mostly excited about was working with my team and achieving milestones together.

But I couldn’t care less about “marketing.” What’s marketing anyways?!

I was sitting in meetings with the big bosses pretending I understand everything they’re talking about. I even managed to throw around some really cool keywords like “customer lifetime value” and “NPS scores increasing.” I actually did understand them but these numbers weren’t my reason to wake up in the morning.

Okay, there was one more thing.

I knew I could make something better on my own. It was the entrepreneur inside of me breaking the chains of being tied to a boss. I was always that way. Rebellious but in a good sense of the word. I got tired of working with people who aren’t pushing me forward. I wanted more and more. And, unfortunately, organizations can’t constantly provide the young and eager with opportunities

So I created my own opportunity.

It’s very simple really. I tried to connect the dots backwards. What did I do in the past as my side hustle without money, recognition or rewards? Just for the fun and joy of it? Just because it was fascinating?

Producing my own podcast. Speaking on stage. Dancing on stage. Producing music videos, commercials and creative videos for competitions. Organizing fun events and parties. Participating in musicals and theatre plays in college. Working for the student paper. Interested in photography and magazines. Organizing plays and dance parties in high school, middle school and primary school. Being constantly on stage in kindergarten.

Seeing any common threads yet?

I did too. That’s all great but where do I start? There are so many things to choose from! God, help me.

The good news was that I was onto something. I have narrowed it down. And that’s 50 percent of the work.

Think of what you love to do most without money, recognition or any benefits. What would you do all day? Where and with whom? Narrow your interests down. Go backwards and connect your own dots.

And so it began.

With me quitting finally my high-paid online marketing job. (I did save money before I threw my life away FYI.) I gave myself three months. To do nothing. Bets decision ever, if you ask me. Because you can’t see what you need to do differently if you’re doing the same thing day in and day out.

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— I would really love to let women know what I know about men and relationships and apply it into their lives. I would love to talk about it more.On stage, on camera, face to face. I would love to share my view on modern feminism and how femininity and womanhood are grossly underrated. I would love to share my love story and inspire others. I miss being on stage. I have gained confidence that people want to hear what I have to say.

— I got it. Girlskill.com Killer name. You can create a platform for women to share their journeys, teach and learn from each other and this could be your thing. Let me see if the domain is available…

It is! $1,595! We’re getting it.

Wait, what?! That was on January 29, 2016.

I gave myself space and started writing about my journey. In the meantime I was seriously considering going to film school to get my Master of Arts and ultimately entering the film industry. I was exploring writing career and fashion design. I took a couple of online courses on business, life purpose and other things. I’ve lived in Mexico, Brazil and Bali.

I became a top writer in Love, Travel and Relationships on Medium. I filmed a course about it.

All this time I was marinating on the idea. What it would be? How would it be? What’s the best strategy: product first or audience first?

I got into masterminds, I worked with coaches. I wasn’t sure.

And then, at some point between me figuring it all out and my community of supporters encouraging me to go for it, I decided.

No more hiding, no more pretending. This is what I’m meant to do. This is what needs to be said.

Three reasons for choosing podcasting as our main channel:

  1. I had done a podcast before and made all the possible mistakes.
  2. I was great at podcasting and had the personality for it. I loved it too! I couldn’t wait to get up and press the record button.
  3. Podcasting is growing rapidly and is a major channel of audience development and message testing.

And so it was done. I recorded my first interview on July 6 with Leanne Beesley.

I was feeling ecstatic. We had such a great talk. I knew back then and there that I was onto something. I was on top of the world.

My excitement and all dreams were crushed when I realized the next day that the recording was gone… Vanished into the abyss of the internet. Not on my laptop, not on my hard drive not in some sort of cloud.

What do I do next?

And here is where the challenges start. Welcome to the world of entrepreneurship, Anna! You didn’t think it would be THAT easy, did you?!

The story continues in the next post! Stay tuned.

Femininity & Relationship Coach| CLAIMED Podcast Founder & Host girlskill.com

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