I Built a Million-Dollar Business Chasing Approval — Here’s What Happened When It All Came Crashing Down

How hitting rock bottom forced me to let go of validation, rediscover trust, and rebuild my life and business from the inside out

For so long, I depended on external things for validation.

First, it was my parents. Then, my teachers. Later, my friends. After that, it was my bosses, my grown-up friends, and then men. When I started my business, it became about my followers and customers.

After I healed the part of me that needed others to make me feel a certain way, I started a business teaching women how to do the same — especially when it came to men.

But here’s the kicker: this need for validation just shifted. It found a new home in my business. I wanted these women to like me, to love what I was posting and sharing. And, of course, I wanted them to buy.

Some of them did. A lot of them didn’t. And how I felt during the day was entirely dependent on whether someone bought or didn’t buy that day.

How crazy is that?

Sure, there’s nothing wrong with feeling amazing after a big sales day. But when your emotional state every single day hinges on sales, you know something is off.

And I know I’m not the only one. Most entrepreneurs feel this way. I built a million-dollar business feeling this way!

It worked — until it didn’t. At some point, it all came crumbling down.

Because here’s the truth: you can’t grow beyond a certain point when you’re operating from a place of neediness. When your self-worth is tied to something outside of you, you’re capped.

I hit my cap hard. I knew something wasn’t right, so I stopped everything.

And then, of course, the money stopped too.

When you’re used to $50–100K months, having those numbers plummet — or, worse, seeing zero revenue days or weeks — feels like death.

If I wasn’t bringing in cash, who was I? What was I worth?

I spiraled into a dark hole, worrying about money, bills, my kids’ school fees, daycare, rent… You name it. It wasn’t a good place to be.

On top of that, I was burned out. My health was suffering. There were days I didn’t even want to get out of bed.

One day, my husband looked at me and said, “What happened to you? You used to be the positive, excited-about-life person, and now you just stay in the room and do nothing.”

Ouch.

Luckily, I found support in coaches, healers, family and friends. Slowly, my health improved, and the burnout started to ease. I began to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

But I’ve realized this collapse was necessary. It forced me to let go of my dependency on sales and money for validation.

It forced me to find joy and excitement even on days when nothing was coming in and there was no evidence that it will be coming…

Can I hold myself in that place for as long as it takes?! Shit, that’s the scary place.

I used to wake up every morning and immediately check my phone to see if sales had come through overnight.

Now, during this Black Friday promotion, I feel excited wondering whether anyone bought. But I don’t need to check right away. I do my morning routine, I get ready, and then I check.

I’m grateful for every dollar that comes in. I’m grateful for every single woman who says “yes” to this work.

Looking back, I realized I had become desensitized to money which is weird because I grew up in the poorest country in Europe where $500 a month is the normal wage…

Seeing big numbers in Stripe every month felt like fake, magical money. I couldn’t feel it, couldn’t touch it. It didn’t mean anything…

That’s when things started to unravel.

When it becomes all about the numbers, the money stops being alive. You stop feeling grateful for every single life you touch, for every single dollar you earn.

I have hundreds of testimonials from women whose lives have been changed by my work. Yet, at my lowest point, I couldn’t feel anything. Just numbness.

It was such a humbling experience.

When everything fell apart, I was brought to my knees. All I had left was trust. Some people call it faith. For me, it was simply trusting that things would work out, even when there was no evidence to suggest they would.

I had to believe that I would be successful again — even when it felt impossible.

So, I started small. I began appreciating the little things:

• Every purchase.

• Every client.

• The work I get to do.

• Living in Bali.

• My family, my kids, my amazing husband.

• The air I breathe, the beauty and kindness around me.

Step by step. One foot in front of the other.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. 🙏

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